Sunday, 21 September 2008

A Busy Day

Just a quick update on today's happenings.

Stewart had a better night's sleep, even though the nurses woke him a couple of times when checking his syringe driver - he will be so much better if we can get him off this and onto tablets so that he can sleep through.

We had visitors all day, most especially his estranged mother who we haven't seen for 4 years (and then for half an hour if that) and really not for 10 years. I left Stewart to pick up Gemma from last night's sleep out and drop her off at the next, which gave them time alone. I don't think anything specific was said but I do know that this has given him peace of mind which at the end of the day is what matters. I know there are issues to face in the future with me and my MIL but I will take one step at a time.

He was very emotional today, first when I put my foot in it and mentioned the kids weddings and then everytime he tried to speak about the kids, he fell apart - it was hard to watch but I know it's the process he has to go through - it's still really shitty though.

We had lots of friends pop in too during the day and by 9pm Stewart was shattered, so I tucked him into bed for a good night's rest hopefully.

The only other major happening today was that Val and Steve, the dog breeders we bought Harley from, came to pick him up to stay for a couple of days and then to pass him on to his new foster parents. I hadn't realised how hard to say goodbye to Harley would be but they made it so much easier for me, poor Alex just sobbed his heart out. I know we have done the right thing for both us and Harley, I know he will be so happy with his new family who have the time to walk him, run with him, play with him and even take him on the boat with them, but that doesn't make the decision feel any less awful. The kids want to visit him but I just feel that it isn't the right thing to do as it will be more painful too see him and then say goodbye all over again. I will miss him though (but my carpet won't, he's left me with a huge hole in it this morning!!)

Right, got to be up early to go get the bagels and be with Stewart for 9am so that I can help him shower etc before the next visitors come along.

We are eternally grateful for everyone's visits, they are tiring but they lift his spirits and it's warming to watch. I don't think he knew how much he was loved.

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