Money, money, money

Actually, it should be no money!!!! Unfortunately due to Stewart having had cancer before we couldn't get life insurance, we were waiting for him to be all clear (6 months more) and then at worst till he was 50 when we would get one of those policies off the tv - it always made me giggle cos June Whitfield always advertised them and she is sooooo much older than us, and I used to tease Stewart that he really was going to be old!! Well we never got there so unfortunately money is slightly tight - I have lost over 75% of our income and still have the same bills etc to pay, actually more in some ways but today was the day for being proactive and I sat down with my wonderful amazing dad and went through some of the figures. It doesn't look good to be honest, but it did make me sort out the paperwork properly and I managed to contact some of the companies who, bless them, have written off the debts in cases like the business advertising, parking fines (don't ask, I found 5 unpaid ones!!!!) and hopefully dad will sort out the rest of the business debts - however as a joint signatory on the business loan it will fall to me to pay it off so I am off to see our new business manager to see what she can do (keep you fingers crossed that the sympathy vote will win here).

I am also going to look at changing the car we have. I have had to get rid of my car cos it essentially was a 2 seater, not much use with 3 kids (I know Jamie drives but even 2 kids can't fit in) so I am left with Stewart's car, a Vectra which is too powerful, too costly, too much to insure, too fuel guzzling and too bleeding big for me to park!! Hopefully we will be able to put our car in part exchange and get something better for me which will cost me less all round.

Well I took the kids up to see Stewart. They were absolutely amazing - not a tear from any of them - can't say that about myself though! We also took Gemma to my grandparent's grave which she had never seen. The ironic thing is that they are three rows behind stewart, to the right hand side, you can actually see their graves from Stewart, so yes that set me off again, it's like they are watching over him. I managed 10 minutes chat on our own before we came home again. I must say I am so proud of my kids in so many ways.

The only major hiccup I have come across is the fact that the sponsored walk I wanted the men to do for our local hospice is women only!!! They can do a sponsored row or it's a knock out but no, no walk is available. So, what have I decided to do - organise one myself - I MUST BE MAD, I hear you cry, but why not, it can't be that difficult can it? - What have I let myself in for?????? I just need to the ok from the hospice that we can use their logo, name etc and then I will get a group of fellas together to help me organise it - and my trusty work colleague and friend, Joanna to help me (she just wants a clipboard, pen round her neck and a megaphone!!). One of my other friends, Ruth will do all the spread sheets I will need - she loves them - organises everything by spreadsheet - even her daughter's birthday party, so she'll come in useful for this!!

Right off to another finance meeting - I am getting pretty sick of them now!